Riding a bus is like making love to a beautiful woman. Your'e never sure if you'll go all the way or have to get off half way in the event of a breakdown. Some are sleek, powerfully silent and have up to date trim. Others, like the one tonight, was battered, late and full up. Standing room only and nowhere to put my oranges. The girl behind me was gassing to her mate on her mobile. Moan moan moan. She's only a young slip of a thing but for Christ sake Fenton, she could moan, all about having to get up early for work and how it's still dark. I think she works in a big posh shop and part time in a talent shop, whatever that is, I think she's called Henna. Kids today, no stamina...I can't wait for next week, my mate Jeromy clakson is sending me to Menorca to try some Spanish buses for his new series of Top Bus, which is nice...
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