Dear Mr Fridge

I would like to apply for the position of Fat Controller but not just yet as I am not nearly fat enough. However, I do have other attributes to offer. I actually am completely useless or even inept at timekeeping and organising things, even when I had my train set, that never ran on time and they were always breaking down. This I feel, will contribute greatly to running your wonderful bus company. I am also particularly good with ex pirates, vagabonds and brigands who have a desire to piss people off at the drop of a hat. As for the costs of running a broken down fleet of converted Tuk Tuks, I actually am as tight as a gnats arse, as my small diminishing group of acquaintances will tell you. I am good at disarray but if you could put me on a course for time travel, that would be nice.